Best activities for a shy child
Shyness in the child consists of great fear, clumsiness and a lack of ease that the child feels according to the circumstances, for example too many people or next to an unknown person. The unhealthy shyness in the child is also reflected in a malaise, a flight from social responsibilities, a withdrawal into oneself, or the tendency to avoid others. Here are the quick points which will give you an idea about Best activities for a shy child
All of this is a very painful emotion for a child. Moreover, it can affect other aspects of his life. And the effects and consequences can be felt until adulthood. However, when taken early, unhealthy shyness is easy to correct.
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How to identify a shy child
It is enough to observe the behavior of other children. For example, he refuses to play with others and prefers to be alone. He hates group games. At school, nursery, or public garden, he manages to avoid other children. He prefers to go unnoticed. In short, he has no friends.
When he is with his parents, he is comfortable and constantly talking. But as soon as they are in the presence of strangers, he is silent immediately.
As he evolves, he takes refuge in individual activities such as the internet or reading. When his classmates invite him, he always arranges to cancel appointments at the last minute. When questioned in class, he loses his resources and blushes constantly.
All these behaviors can be observed from the age of three. Shyness hurts the child. It causes great distress at home. The child is afraid to face the others, becomes very anxious and has the feeling of being misunderstood.
Here are some best activities for a shy child to overcome it.
The 7 main causes of shyness in children
Shyness in children can have several causes. But each case is unique and unique to each child.
- Heredity: Some studies have shown that shyness in child development is rooted in their family. Some go so far as to say that it could be partially genetic. But, for the moment, no science has been able to show that shyness in children is due to any gene.
- Parental Behavior: Other experiences have also shown that shy parents are likely to have shy children. Some parents’ behaviors may also influence shyness in the child.
- The overprotection of parents: a child who is overprotected does not have the opportunity to flourish properly or to be socially independent. Thus, he grows up with a lack of confidence, which prevents him from taking initiatives or making his own decisions. In such circumstances, anxiety and inner insecurity become the source of shyness.
- Surroundings: The environment in which the child lives may have an impact on his / her future life and shyness, especially when dealing with emotional abuse and abuse.
- Frequent exposure to new painful situations: when the child is constantly exposed to new painful experiences such as a lack of affection, school failures, family conflicts or untimely moves, he tends to fall back on him. even and being afraid for his future, hence his shyness.
- Negative comments and criticisms. When a child takes initiatives, he needs encouragement or support from his family or friends. But it happens that, on the contrary, he is rather criticized, threatened with punishment, stigmatized, whenever he undertakes something. In these cases, he may develop shyness. Instead of making fun of him, the best solution would be to encourage him when he undertakes, and even more so if he is on a good path. And it must, of course, correct when it is being deflected.
- Lack of benchmarks: Lacking experiences, children need to be guided by their parents to develop harmoniously. But unfortunately, because of ignorance or lack of time, some parents let their children develop on their own. Thus, when they encounter painful, stressful or difficult situations, they tend to fall back on themselves. Having no one to confide in, they develop an unhealthy shyness.
The consequences of sickly shyness in child development
Unhealthy timidity has unfortunate consequences for a child’s life. Not only does it interferes with his activities and relationships, but also prevents him from expressing himself and flourishing. In general, sickly shyness occurs in two periods. The first phase occurs at a very young age when the child is 6 months old.
The second phase of sickly shyness occurs at the age of 2, but it is only at the age of 3 years that it manifests itself seriously. From then on, there are some signs of unhealthy shyness in the child, particularly in social and academic skills.
In addition to a lack of confidence, the child also has serious problems making friends. When he becomes an adult, he is afraid to take initiatives or to venture into certain companies, for fear of failing or appearing ridiculous.
How to help a shy child socialize?
Many parents think that sickly shyness is part of their children’s character. However, it is not the case. It is rather an obstacle to the development that develops in the child from an early age and can evolve to adulthood and even to the end of his life.
In some children, it can happen that shyness can finish itself, from 13 years. But, these are rather rare cases and this is explained by the adolescence period. During this period, the child who was previously very shy becomes socially more skilled without the help of anyone.
For other children, shyness can evolve into advanced adulthood. For these, there are some solutions or activities to overcome shyness and we have also explained how to help a shy child socialize.
In order for a child to overcome his lack of self-confidence and thus become much more sociable, the role of parents is paramount. Indeed, some parents’ attitudes can prevent the child from having confidence and thus favor shyness.
One of the first points is that the child must not be able to detect certain anxiety related to his shyness in his parents. It would only accentuate his anxiety, his shyness, and his withdrawal.
Some parents tend to prevent their children from playing with their classmates on the grounds that they have to focus solely on school activities. Although these play an important role in the child’s development, the child needs sociability activities. So you have to let him blossom and play from time to time with his classmates. Parents should encourage him to express his anxiety and especially to go to others. So you have to help him regain his trust with other children both at home and at school. But, you have to do this discreetly.
Parents can also register for social activities to overcome shyness, such as theater. Regular practice of a team sport, such as football, basketball or handball, is also recommended.
This allows the child to socialize, it helps him to pass his initial mistrust and overcome his shyness. In addition, it also helps his physical development.
In the most extreme cases, there are some solutions to overcome shyness in child development. Among others, we could mention:
- Behavioral therapy is role-based learning to overcome fear when it comes to building an emotional relationship, approaching people or being approached.
- Art therapy is a technique of restoring self-confidence through staging. This can be done for example by participating in a theater or cinema.
- The help of a professional can be of great help.
Best activities for a shy child
Do not put your child in an activity for the sole purpose of helping him overcome his shyness. Ask him first what he would like to do. Does he have a special gift? What activity does he enjoy in general? Tinker, draw, sing … From there, choose an activity with a small number of participants to facilitate the adaptation of your child to the group.
Playing sports can be beneficial as well as the theater. And why not role plays at home? Why not let the child play mom or dad when we go shopping for example? As long as your child can express himself in a pleasant environment, the activity can only be beneficial for him.
When dealing with shy children it is fundamental to have patience with them, value them and socialize them little by little, always keeping in mind that each of them has its own rhythm and you have to avoid feeling uncomfortable. Today we propose a series of educational activities that will help the shy child to gain confidence with him while learning or developing a new skill or how to help a shy child participate in school.
How to help a shy child participate in school
Therefore, team sports (soccer, basketball or volleyball, among others) are recommended activities for shy, shameful or introverted children. In addition to helping them overcome their fears and insecurities, team sports help improve speed, reflexes, agility, concentration. Likewise, they encourage teamwork, tolerance, respect for the rules of the game and the adversary.
The martial arts are also suitable for shy children. It gives them security and they can start practicing after 5 years. Thanks to the martial arts, self-confidence, self-control, and proper motor development are exercised. In the same way, it improves coordination, endurance, strength, speed, and flexibility.
There are other types of activities to overcome shyness that is carried out in a natural environment highly recommended for shy children. Being in contact with nature, hiking in the countryside, knowing about the flora and fauna of a natural environment are conducive to those introverted children, since they tend to like it, and it is a good way for them to learn to know the environment and to relate to other colleagues.
On the other hand, we can mention that artistic activities are also indicated for shy or insecure children. All of them favor creativity, imagination, taste for aesthetics and the spirit of overcoming. They are ways in which children can express and externalize much of their inner world, and a way to feel better about them, which will provide them with greater security.
The dance or the ballet allows knowing better the own body of the children so that it contributes flexibility and agility. In this type of activities, the corporal expression is developed, which can be very helpful for the shy child. It also favors sociability with other partners, concentration and memory.
The literature tends to fascinate many children who, being timid, prefer to read longer participate in social activities in many cases. It has great advantages. The most important is that it stimulates the mind, fosters interest in reading, and can help children learn from other stories portrayed in books and can relate better thanks to the examples that appear in many literary works.
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How to remove shyness in child
When trying to help a child overcome his shyness, we must bear in mind that a large part of his situation stems from a lack of confidence and security. It must also be borne in mind that, although the intentions are good, some of the classic ways that many employees so that shyness in child development can actually further reduce their self-confidence and self-esteem. That is why below are some ways to help the shy child that may be useful.
1. Encourage his achievements
It is important for a child, especially if he is shy and insecure, to see how his approaches to acting are encouraged and experienced as something positive by his parents or teachers. Praising and congratulating their performance will make the child feel more confident and facilitate and reinforce their future behavior and expression. Of course, the congratulation must be sincere.
2. Teach him to relativize and value positively his errors
Making mistakes is not bad, but it gives us an opportunity to learn. Timid people often have a certain fear of doing things wrong and being judged for it. Teach her that this is not the case. It is not about pretending that he does everything right, but about making him see that making mistakes is positive, since in the long run he allows him to improve his performance and that is not going to be considered bad.
3. Do not signal or criticize
A child who feels insecure will not feel better because we tell him he is shy or criticize his lack of action. It is a mistake that, although it seems surprising, many people commit in their attempt to spur on their little ones, as an outburst of badly directed anger or even without realizing it.
4. Increase positive self-instructions and self-reinforcements
Timid people often underestimate their achievements and maximize their mistakes, as well as not self-reinforcing enough for the former. It is also common to give self-instructions with negative or hesitant tints, such as the typical “I can not …” or “I do not know …”. We must try to change these ways of self-directed, as well as congratulate yourself when you do things right.
5. Generate socialization opportunities
A good way to try to help shy children to overcome their shyness is to facilitate the existence of situations in which they can test and face their insecurities and meet people.
For example, going to the park with him allows not only to share time together but also to get in touch with his peers.
It is important that at least initially the parent or a trusted figure is present or in the vicinity, the child may seek support and feel more secure. All these are the best activities to overcome shyness.
6. Do not force it!
Although it seems contradictory with the previous point, it is not. One thing is to make it easier for the child to have social contact, but it is quite another to force him to do so when he does not want to or force him to play with or approach children he does not know or want to know. This will be seen as an imposition and as something aversive, appearing resistances and making it difficult for timidity to really overcome. It is about the child flowing naturally, not how or when we want him to do it.
7. Overprotection does not help
It is logical that we want our children, students or children, in general, to be safe and happy at all times. And as we have said, criticism, signaling and the experience of social action as an obligation do not help but harm the possibility of increasing their self-confidence. But putting them in a bubble where everything is done well, everything is done and where nothing bad ever happens can also lead to the same thing: the child may feel unable to face real life, not knowing how to react to environmental and social demands or before possible aversive elements.
8. Give an example
The little ones imitate what they see at home since childhood. One way to overcome shyness in child development is to make models with respect to interaction with others. If they conceive that proactivity and socialization are something normal, they will learn the ways of making them observe and it will be easier for them to act in the same way.
9. It favors your decision making and your responsibility
One way to encourage the child to feel more confident about himself is to make him a participant in decision-making. Propose to decide things, however minimal they may be (for example where you want to go or what you want them to play), and make them effective allows you to see that your opinions are taken into account and that they have an effect on reality.
10. Hobbies
Another aspect that can help shy children to have their character does not interfere or even that this feature decrease is the realization of activities of interest. Writing, board games, sports, painting, music, dance or cooking are some examples of activities that you may like, and whose domain can increase self-confidence. Of course, again we remember that you have to like the child and not be an element of pressure.
11. Theater or role plays
Although it could actually be included in the previous section, this element has been separated because in it the child must take the role or role of another person or being, representing a series of characteristics and ways of doing that do not have to be their own. The child can learn and observe other ways of acting. The interpretation also tends to favor the emergence of improvisation and have a fast pace that although demanding does not usually leave much time to assess whether things are doing right or wrong.
12. Encourage expressing
It is important to keep in mind that shy children tend to keep things to them. Therefore it is useful to use techniques and activities that allow its expressiveness. Drawing, symbolic play or creating stories with him are good ways to do it.